Disgusting Self-Indulgence

Opening Day

2011-04-05T06:28:00.000-07:00

This Sunday is the Wawa 5 Table Reading, which is like our Opening Day. This is where we all gather, catch up about the offseason and then we read thru about 30 scripts that I have written during the Winter. We vote on each one whether it is Good, Decent, or Shit. Then, we take the highest scoring 10 scripts and begin production on them. Some are short films and some are live sketches. We have all Summer to improve them.

Here is a list of the scripts that we will be narrowing down to 10 on Sunday:

1. The Book of Jobs

2. Car Salesmen

3. A Total Bitch

4. Indie Track Review

5. Becky Rosenblatt’s Yet-To-Be-Named VLOG

6. The Maternity Ward

7. You Haven’t Heard?

8. Why Do We Always Hurt The Ones We Love?

9. Immigrant in the Land of Normalcy

10. The Intervention

11. The Vomit Guy

12. Patrick Swayze

13. Middle Class Hero

14. The Curious Case of Brian Bolkus

15. My Comeback Plan for Phil Collins

16. Jeff’s World

17. I Love Oil!

18. Keep Coming Back

19. Immunity

20. Home From College

21. Guys Named Floyd

22. Who Would You Rather Be Facebook Friends With?

23. Cousin Smitty Humps a Fire Hydrant After Eagles Win

24. Bachelor Party

25. Same ‘Ole, Same ‘Ole

26. Higher Than Thou

27. Wal-Mart Fan Mail

28. Bending Over Backwards

29. Three Dicks from Austin

30. Eric and Little Ricky

31. Why is There Something Rather Than Nothing?

32. One Man Audience

Wawapalooza 5: Under Destruction

2011-02-27T15:16:00.000-08:00

We just registered with the Fringe for Wawapalooza 5: Under Destruction, the latest installment of the annual show. Can't believe it just keeps going, but doing a small local theatre and film show in an established festival is very fulfilling, so why mess with success.

Here's our first take at an image for the show.

Back from Baby Hibernation

2011-02-27T14:43:00.001-08:00

This is the reason the site has been dormant for a while.

Gabriel Loc Balchunas--->

Humility, Or, Why I Stopped Rooting for Tiger Woods and Started Rooting for Michael Vick

2011-01-08T09:46:00.000-08:00

I remember back in 2006 watching Michael Vick on the Atlanta Falcons and thinking how he seemed like a jerk and was overrated as a Quarterback. Then, a year later, we all heard about the dogfighting ring. Then, my opinion of him was that he was evil and pretty much deserved to die by being thrown into a pack of hungry Pit bulls.

Around the same time, I recall being enamored by Tiger Woods and watching any Golf tournament he was in. He was not only electrifying on the course, but he also displayed an infectious charm. Pretty much everyone was in love with Tiger Woods.

Then, both men personally self-destructed. Vick was convicted of the dogfighting and sent to jail and Tiger was exposed as a serial cheater and isolated himself in his Orlando house. Two superstars crashed and burned.

Fast forward to 2010, both men are out there again trying to carry on and play their respective sports.

Surprisingly, I’ve found myself rooting for Michael Vick to do well, and rooting against Tiger Woods. This is a complete 180 degree change from just a few years ago. It got me thinking about how this could’ve happened and why I felt this way.

It all comes down to humility. I still don’t believe Tiger has been humbled. First, he never really owned up to it, but rather blamed the media for everything. Second, he didn’t take any real time off to rehabilitate. He played in the Masters only a few short months after he was caught by his wife sleeping with everyone from porn stars to the neighbor’s daughter.

Now granted, he didn’t kill anyone, but what he did was so compulsive and slimy that I felt he could have taken more time, especially considering the incalculable damage to his wife and children. After all, not only did he have sex with every woman except his wife, he was did it with a waitress in a parked car while his wife went into labor with their first child. Ouch.

If he had taken a year off from golf to be with his wife and children and work on himself the way he works on his swing, there is no doubt he would have held the marriage together.

But instead he went on chasing glory and the thrill of the win. He’s addicted to that rush. So, for him, sinking a putt and hearing the cheers is like a hit off a crack pipe.

At tournament press conferences, he’s so defensive and gives the evil stare to anyone who would sink so low as to ask him about his affairs. He acts like they have no class. Tiger reminds me of a dried drunk in that he’s off the sauce, but not really recovering or working a program.

He also did that insane Nike commercial with his dead Dad’s voice asking “What have you learned?” It’s unthinkable that he would exploit his dead dad and his wife’s pain for the sake of his sports image. His ego has taken over him like a cancer. There is no more Eldrick (his birth name), it’s only Tiger.

This was all clear to me at the 2010 Chevron World Challenge. He was tied with Graeme McDowell going into the final hole. Tiger hit an amazing approach shot that landed three feet from the pin. The crowd erupted and Tiger did a double fist pump as usual. But his fist pump was no longer natural- it now seems contaminated with anger and venom.

Graeme, on the other hand, seemed pure and humble in comparison. Graeme sunk an amazing putt to beat Tiger. Afterwards, instead or praising Graeme’s spectacular play he simply said he didn’t do enough to win. He comes off pissy.

We all have feelings and emotion when we watch sports, so it’s no wonder we are tuned in to the athlete as a person. And the composite feeling I have for Tiger is bad. He’s like the protagonist in a movie who hasn’t gone through a full Second Act. It’s like Tiger needs the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future to break him down.

On the other hand, I always thought Vick was an evil creep. But for some reason, over the course of this NFL season, I found myself really pulling for Vick to escape tacklers and lead his team to victory. And, I’m not even a big Eagles fan.

The thing is Michael Vick has been through the Valley of Death. You can see the shame in his eyes. He is just happy to be out of jail and given a second chance. He’s humble.

Jail may have been the best thing that ever happened to Vick. Think about how awful he must have felt to be in the prison yard wearing State-issued clothes playing all-time QB with the inmates. He had a lot of time to reflect on how he had everything and threw it away. And I’m certain he is still haunted by what he did to those dogs.

Unlike Woods, Vick has become dedicated to helping others avoid his mistakes by speaking at schools to kids about not making the mistake he made. He has no denial at all, it’s all out in the open and he has taken responsibility. Believe it or not, he’s a great model for young people.

Vick also has become a Christian. He always points up after a score or thanks God before a press conference. I’m not saying this is necessary for humility, but if you have God in your life, then there’s no way you can actually be God. It puts thing in perspective and creates a mind-set in which humility can flourish.

Finally, Vick has become open-minded and willing to listen to coaches and elders. He has great mentors in both Tony Dungy and Andy Reid. Tony has helped him become a better human being and Andy has helped him become a better football player. Who knew we’d ever see Vick turn into one of the Leagues’s premier pocket Quarterbacks?

Another thing that helped turn me into a Vick fan was that he was totally happy being Kevin Kolb’s backup. After playing amazingly in the game in Detroit when Kolb was hurt, he said “This is Kevin’s team, I’m just doing what I can till he’s healthy.” To say that knowing how much talent he was sitting on takes class and respect.

I’m not the only one who likes to watch Vick now. Just about every Eagles game gets the highest TV ratings for the NFL, which is why many games in the second half of the season were moved to prime time. Even Obama seems to be a fan.

Time will tell if Vick can keep it up. Time will also tell if Tiger can overcome his own ego and allow humility into his heart. Then, we can all cheer carefree when he does some amazing Tiger shot.

For the time being however, I’ll be cheering for the Philadelphia Eagles and pretty much any European golfer.

Cousin Billy Celebrates Eagles Win

2010-12-23T08:23:00.000-08:00

Just when I think spoofing Eagles fans is played out, something like this comes along to inspire and renew. It gets good at 1:30. (I imagine how funny it would be if someone told him there was a flag on the play)

LINK HERE: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6EjS_h-6es&t=1m40s

A Real Show

2010-12-13T09:55:00.000-08:00

This past weekend I saw 1812 Productions yearly political satire show called "This is the Week That Is" and it was great. It was well written, interesting, lively, had tons of set and costume changes and muscial numbers, a bit of improv and the video design was off the charts. They had three separated screens of different sizes all with projections working in tandem. There must have been 100 images, videos, audio cues. (you can see from the pic the vividness of costumes, good lighting and the screens in background)

The amount of work that goes into this is huge. However, they have hired professionals across the board- people who do this stuff year-round and so are always learning and able to add value. I feel I can never get to this level without scrapping certain things with our show. This show reminds me why people specialize and why people go to school to learn how to put on a show. We are just small potatoes and will never expand unless there is major changes. But maybe that's ok. I don't know.

Away Game

2010-11-18T10:08:00.000-08:00

The other night we performed a few pieces at a show with some other comedy acts. The other performers were all great and very nice people. I think we did ok, but I always get weirded out performing in front of other performers. Not sure why. Feels like an "away game" on someone else's field. When we do our Fringe run at Society Hill Playhouse we are in our element and the show, while made up of many pieces, is like one complete 'thought' whereas everytime we do a section or sketch or show one video it never feels quite right.

In the end though, none of this matters anyway...

Downtime?

2010-10-09T17:47:00.001-07:00

October was supposed to be nothing more than me lying on the couch all weekend slothed out watching football and napping. I've done some of that but all the sudden my schedule is pretty full with readings, performances, meetings and the national film challenge.

I've also been motivated to write a few pieces, including a longer play called "Three Dicks from Austin" about Lance Armstrong, Andy Roddick and Matthew McConneghey trying to solve a mystery. Also, working on "Middle Class Hero" a monologue about a guy giving Commencement address to Stockton State U about the benefits of just being mediocre. And, "Testosteroned" about a guy at a Bachelor Party who ODs on testosterone and gets a little too crazy. And I'm doing some prelim research for a possible documentary on the infamous Eagles Court. I'm endlessly fascinated by insane Eagles fans, what can i say...

Walking on Air

2010-09-05T05:03:00.001-07:00

We are in the middle of our Fringe run. Feeling really good as we our first three shows were all sold out (90 seats). I always feel like no one will come, and then this happens. I'm very grateful. But, I know this show is very good, I must say - the best one yet by far. It's fast, tight and funny. Two years ago, City Paper reviewed Wawapalooza 2 and said it had some funny quips but overall was "mildly entertaining" This motivated me and the crew to work harder and erase the "mildly" from the entertaining. So, fast fwd two years later, City Paper reviewed Friday's show and had this to say:
"Suprisingly spot-on. Smart, inspired bits of funny business." It feels good because we earned it.

Wawapalooza 4 Rehearsal Pics

2010-08-22T17:19:00.001-07:00

Van Gogh

2010-08-19T03:04:00.000-07:00

Care of Bonnie's Photoshop skills.

3 Weeks till Fringe

2010-08-12T03:17:00.000-07:00

Mindset. 3 Weeks till the new show opens. This year, I'm less stressed because we have 21 minutes of short films, which is already in can and can't get fucked up- you just hit 'play'. As for the other 45 min of live theatre, sure I worry about the actors' lack of energy or forgetting lines, but really I can only do so much. It will all work out. The key is to have fun and enjoy our loose and fringe-y show that we've created. As one of the actresses told me, "It ain't Shakespeare"

Props. One thing that will help is we aren't using props or exotic furniture this year. In year's past we loaded all kinds of shit. Last year for K-Mart sketch we used a real 50lb cash register and bag of charcoal and sign and etc. This year we will fake everything. This will make up for in speed, what it takes away from in realism. This also is one less headache for me.

Press. I foresee lack of press for us this year. I sense we are old news. Even though I think this show is fresh and targets certain things that aren't being targeted or satirized too much. Anyhow, I can't control that. I can only control the process up to the show.

Tech. We were at theatre on Tuesday to do a little tech and let me just say that Wayne is amazing, having him is huge. He was able to set up and align projection and work the board and all that. And he's a super nice guy. Tech is the least of my worries thanks to him.

The Next Short Film

2010-06-21T17:43:00.000-07:00

With "The List" finally done, and all my side projects completed, I am not focusing on shooting the third (and final) short film for Wawapalooza 4. The short is called "The Accidental Environmentalist" and is about how my Grandma is best environmentalist I've even met, and she doesn't even know it! A true model for us all.

I also take down several Eco-Hypocrites including Thom Yorke, Leonardo DiCaprio and of course, Al Gore. (the key for me is to figure out how to make it funny!)
This is not meant to be a left or right thing, just that I'm pretty tired of hearing how I need to change my lifestyle when these people pollute and trash the planet at a rate of 50 times an average person. Hypocrisy is something that pushes my buttons, especially under the guise of righteousness. Ech. This pic of Al Gore says it all...

Cast Photo

2010-06-12T06:28:00.001-07:00

May 2010

Wawapalooza 4 Image

2010-05-19T17:49:00.000-07:00

Finally settled on a image for show (above) after several options. I like it as it is consistent with the other years' in that it takes an iconic image and combines it with something from Wawa in a way that also is a metaphor for the meterial. (I'm sure I overthink this stuff).

On a side note, I've just personally been so busy with non-IdRather stuff.. namely assistant directing for Tweltfth Night, taking a playwriting class and shooting The List and the 48 Hour Film Festival. I'm tired.

Short Film #2: "The List"

2010-04-05T10:29:00.000-07:00

Saturday was DAY ONE of shooting "The List" which is the second short film for Wawapalooza 4. We shot all over Lower Bucks County, including in a pizza place, strip mall and a scuzzy park. So far, I'm happy with the results and I think it will be funny. I still have some questions to myself on how to arrange it and how much to use graphics and music, but I think the material should play well. The posted pic is one of many takes where Mandy slaps Jeff. Poor guy had a red face at the end of the day...

The List

2010-03-11T17:14:00.000-08:00

Now that The Mustache is over, the next project on the horizon is another short film called "The List" which we will shoot in April and May. This is a short film based on a section of Jeff Soles' stand-up routine. When I saw his act last, I was really drawn into his bit where he pulls out a piece of paper and explains to the crowd that he has a list of things that if a girl does, he will immediately break up with them. Some of those things include breathing through her mouth, mispronouncing Reece's Pieces and wearing anything with Disney on it. It's great fun that he is so serious about these trivial things. The more angry and intense on stage he gets the funnier it is.

I got an idea to model the short film after Michael Jackson's Thriller video. Not the dancing, but the beginning, where he is telling his girl in the park that he's not like other guys. This is going to be our template then we will do a bunch of cutaways to Jeff's list as he is going through it.

This should be a blast to shoot, it will be much much less of a production then The Mustache and more rogue, like Owen vs Ikea shoot. Most of it will be shot in Lower Bucks County, where Jeff lives with girls Jeff knows. So, I'm approaching this as a mini-trip into Jeff's world and that's why I think the "romantic goth" style will fit nicely.

The 10% Doucher Theorum

2010-02-21T05:55:00.000-08:00

I've come up with a theory: 10% of all people you work with in the world are Douches, especially in the "Arts" world. I've been doing this theatre/film stuff for four years now, and most people are a delight and provide not only good performances/work, but provide a nice energy and smile. HOWEVER, some people choose to Douche-out for whatever reason and suck energy in and hoard it for themselves like vampires. Mostly it's people who think too highly of themselves and are nursing a giant insecurity. It's a shame.. but I'm learning to accept that whatever project or show you work in, you're going to have 90% awesomeness and 10% douche-baggery.

I call it "The 10% Doucher Theorum"

Ok, that's all on that.. I don't like to be negative, but I can't help but make observations.

Done!

2010-02-14T16:34:00.000-08:00

Today we wrapped on The Mustache. I was very pleased with the outcome. We shot it in 2.5 days, right on schedule. The acting was amazing, I couldn't have been happier. The Canon 7D shot as beautifully as we had hoped and Taka and Tony were great with it. Our sound guys were hard-working and nice. Trang cooked up a storm. Wayne was the best host/jack-of-all-trades ever. Almost everyone joined the spirit and contributed to the nice vibe we had going. No major ordeals or back-of-the-mind worries. I just hope the rest of the cast and crew felt the same way. Now it's up to Giz to edit it all and make sushi out of fish and rice.

I do feel utterly exhausted by it all though. The planning, the people, the mustaches.. A reminder that even good things need to end. I'm back at home now, off to Valentine's Day dinner.

Mustache Shoot - Pre Shoot Tech

2010-02-12T04:33:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was all about preparing for the Mustache shoot. Started with me shoveling my car out from a mound of snow, then I went and shoveled my Mom's driveway, then drove to New York to pick up Giz, and we had to make 4 separate stops, for the lights, lenses, camera rigs and then finally to Best Buy for a monitor and hard drive.
Then, we rushed over to the location to meet all the crew. Tony coulnt't make it, but Taka did. We went over lighting schemes and played with the camera. Ethan had the sound working great. Gus and I were stand-ins and had fun spewing out absurdities. Wayne was awesome as host and bought a bunch of snacks and made coffee.

We broke at around 9:15pm.

Now I'm off to get Bonnie and all the wardrobe, stop at Wawa to get hoagies and grape soda for props, and snickers for us to eat. Then, I come back and pick up Trang who has been slaving in the kitched for 3 hours making all kinds of culinary delights for the cast and crew.

Finally, a little prayer that everyone shows up or Day 1.

Missile Command

2010-02-07T07:14:00.000-08:00

Less than week till we shoot *The Mustache* This coming week is all about executing and troubleshooting. It's a lot like a game of Missile Command with the scheduling, re-writing, emails, props, food, lights, driving, headaches and prayers that it doesn't snow again!

We had a rehearsal last weekend, which went great. We discovered some things we needed to correct and the cast and crew had a chance to gel. The actors did a really fruitful improv session. We merged the existing script, which was written in my bedroom, with the improv and style of the actors, to hopefully arrive at a real-sounding synergy between writer and actor.

We also got a chance to see the Canon 7D in action and were blown away by the richness and color of the Canon 7D. It is twice as good as our Panasonic DV cameras. I'm picking up Giz and a bunch of equipment in New York this Thursday. More to come...

Gearing Up

2010-01-18T18:39:00.000-08:00

About a month to go till we shoot *The Mustache.* We have pretty much the entire cast and crew set. This is easily the largest group of people, biggest budget and most talent on any project IdRatherBeHere has been involved with.

CAST:

Jared Delaney as Alex

D'arcy Fellona as Lauren

Jared Nelson as Peter

Amanda Siebold as The Floozy

Ian Sullivan as Evan

CREW:

Eric Balchunas: Writer/Executive Producer

Gisela Aydin: Director/Executive Producer

Tony Obfenda: Director of Photography

Taka Ogawa: Director of Photography

Ken Jordan: Lighting Design

Dan Plunkett: Producer

Gus Milligan: Producer

???: Sound Recordist

Jim Philbrick: Boom Operator

Ken Jordan: Lighting Design

Bonnie Quick: Wardrobe Director

Wayne Johnson: Electric/Grip

Trang Balchunas/Dan Lewis: Top Chef

Goals for 2010

2010-01-02T08:48:00.000-08:00

I've drawn up four simple goals for 2010 for IdRatherBeHere:

1. TV Show Pitch
This weekend I wrote an 8 page first draft of a treatment for a TV show about South Jersey. Possible title(s) are "SoJo" or "The Hometown Heroes." The premise of the show is a guy who moves back to SoJo from the city and tries to acclamate amongst the cast of characters down there. I have a wealth of stories, characters and ideas for this. I have mapped out 10 episodes and love how easily the writing comes for this.

2. Short Film Festival
The short film we are shooting in February called *The Mustache* may act as a pilot or a preview to be used in concert with the Treatment in a TV show pitch. BUT, we want to see this shown in at least a few film fests. We think we have a good shot.

3. Wawapalooza 4
Also planning Wawapalooza 4. This year should be the best yet, as we've brought in some experienced, new blood to add to show's content. I'm also looking to make the show more diverse by adding modern dance, stand-up and even artwork, in addition to the short films and sketches. I've got about 12 scripts in the bag so far. And, I'd like to start using musicians' songs for transitions and pre-show.

4. Give birth to one full-lenght script
My final goal for 2010 is to just complete a long play and have it produced in some way, even if it's just a reading. The main idea is to get done a 60-70 page play. It is very difficult for me as I get bored easily so I gravitate towards shorter pieces. I have 2-3 plays that I can expand, just need to stick to it.

Tackling Earl Campbell

2009-11-10T03:39:00.000-08:00

Last night I was searching for a decent old school Earl Campbell jersey on eBay. It got me on youtube watching some old highlight films of Earl as a running back for the Houston Oilers. This one is insane:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfJybuzkMT0

I am writing a longer piece called "Tackling Earl Campbell" which is a personal story about struggling with something. I mean, no running back today ran like Earl Campbell. He was a monster. Hence, trying to tackle him is the perfect metaphor for overcoming a huuuge obstacle in life.

Grizzly Bear

2009-11-03T18:09:00.000-08:00

Getting into Grizzly Bear's album "Veckatimest" It takes a few listens, but wow, it's tremendous.

A great album to spark the imagination.

Youtube the song "Two Weeks" or "Ready, Able"

Here We Go...

2009-10-29T09:35:00.000-07:00

Ok, I'm going to dedicate a lot of the blog for the next few months to tracking the production of the short film:
“THE MUSTACHE”
Written by Eric Balchunas
Directed by Gisela Aydin
SYNOPSIS:
Evan, a hometown guy who has moved to Williamsburg, Brooklyn and turned into a hipster, comes back home to South Jersey for the weekend sporting a trendy new mustache. This new facial hair triggers a whole chain events with his old friends, ex-girlfriend and a floozy, resulting in a thorough and comedic deconstruction of Evan’s identity.
*****
With this short we will be going into a new area of real production and plan to submit to Sundance Film Festival and many other national film fests.

The two big things going on now are:
1. Auditions - We are holding auditions on Nov 7.

2. Equipment - We are looking at renting a camera called the Canon 7D, which will literally come out right before our shoot. It shoots 24fps, which will give the short a film-like quality.

Two Things at Once

2009-10-21T18:06:00.000-07:00

All the sudden there are two projects developing at once:

1. HELIUM - Working with the typical crew to get ready for a show at Helium. We are allowed one sketch and if judged as the best we get a slot in the Philly Sketchfest in December. Doesn't that sound like the plot of some 80s movie? Anyhow, I'm still debating what sketch we should perform. Right now I'm 40% Inner Child, 40% Kmart and 30% Camping Sketch. Going to get some input.

2. SHORT FILM - Working with Giz to cast The Mustache short film using outside actors. Already we've received some decent resumes. It will be fun to mix it up on this project and swing for the fences. Giz is key, with her the end product will be elevated and we intend to submit to some festivals. We are using no copyrighted music or pics or anything. A first for me!

The Mustache

2009-10-14T19:57:00.000-07:00

I am doing some editing on a short play I wrote 18 months ago called *The Mustache* which is about one of the hometown heroes, who moves to nyc, and then comes home for a long weekend sporting a mustache. He thinks it's cool cos he sees hipsters in the East Village bars wearing them and his friends think he's an ass, trying to be cool. There's also a love triangle involved.

We are having a rehearsal in a few weeks. I hope it reads as well I think it can. I am trying to do this new thing where I thread into a short script a plot of a real popular movie, so that it becomes a play that literally plays out the "life imitates art" concept. I am so affected by pop culture especially as a kid, that it makes perfect sense that my writing reflect that, almost becoming unreal, or a halfway zone between reality and pop culture.

Performing in December

2009-10-07T18:45:00.000-07:00

Just signed us up to perform on Dec 6 and 7 at UPenn modern dance show. The reason is there is an old script that I really want to make into a short film. It's called *The Mustache* and is about one of the hometown friends who lives in nyc comes back sporting a mustache because he thinks it's cool. Doing this live performance should help set the stage to make the film in January.

I think performing live is the ultimate tool to use for writing because a) it applies pressure and deadline b) you know from audience what's good and what sucks. It's a distillation process.

We may also do a new sketch if they give us two slots. I already have thrown some new ideas up on my board, although I've kept with my goal to do no real writing for another few weeks.

What else to name a blog?

2009-10-01T17:18:00.000-07:00

This is the first post of the blog i am calling "Disgusting Self-Indulgence," which is the best thing I could think of to name a blog. I don't even pretend that anyone will read this or care about what I have to say, but I do enjoy writing, so I guess it's more for my benefit in the end- which brings us back to the natural title for the blog.

So anyway, the third Wawapalooza came and went with a bang. Many months of writing, editing, planning, coordinating, picking up props and stressing over schedules are over. It's always bittersweet. But, I'm working on doing nothing from now thru then end of October. I did submit a longer play I wrote to a workshop conference called PlayPenn and I do plan on submitting the Whole Foods video to two short film fest.. but other than small stuff like that, I'm hanging in, eating, watching college football and not worrying about anything for a change...